Performed by Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider, Tim Herlihy, and Steve Koren
Russel: [Shouting] "Come on Robert! Pitch it in there, baby! We´re behind you here in right field! One down! Two to go! Hum it now! Yeah! Show ´em the magic! This chump can´t hit!"
[Whispering to himself] "Please God, don´t help him hit it to me. Anywhere but to right field. Please God, I bet you." [Shouting] "Come on now! No batter! No batter! Big whiffer! Big whiffer!" [Whispering] "Oh please, don´t let him hit it to me. My God, not to me." [Shouting] "Steam it baby! Steam it!" [Whispering] "Oh God no, Oh God no, Oh God no, Oh God no." [Ball is hit]
Russel: [Shouting] "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" [Whispering] "Oh good! It´s not to me." [Shouting] "Good catch, Steven! Nice glove! You da man! Two away now! Lookin´ good! We´re all looking good out here! Come on Robert! This lump of crap can´t hit!"
[Whiserping] "Oh God, he´s a leftie! A big leftie! Total power to hit it. He´s gonna pile it right to me and there´s nothing I can do to stop him." [Shouting] "Pitch ´em the funny one, Robert! Big whiffer! Big whiffer!" [Whispering] "Oh he is a natural athlete and I am so worthless. Please God, take his life. Make him die." [Shouting] "No batter! No batter!" [Ball is hit]
Russel: [Whispering] "Oh God. This is not happening. No, don´t do this to me. Please. Make it stop." [Ball hits Russel] Russel: "OWWWW! My elbow!" M1: "Throw it to second! Pick it up already!" Russel: "Take it! Just take the ball!"
[Russel tosses the ball] M2: "Nice throw, you pansy!" Russel: [Whispering] "Ok, get under control. Easy now, easy. Say something to the team." [Shouting] "Good hussle everybody! Yeah! Nice work! Play´s at third!" [Whispering] "That wasn´t funny, Lord. I´ve been so good and for what!?" [Shouting] "Come on, Robert! Settle down! Just throw straight! You get it across the plate! We´ll take care of the rest!" [Whispering] "Oh no, another lefty." [Ball is hit]
Russel: [Shouting] "NOO! Why me again!?" [Ball hits Russel] Russel: "OWWWW! My neck!" [Panting & Whining] "I can´t breath. I can´t breath."
M2: "Pick it up and throw it, you moron!" Russel: [Whining] "Here..come on, here.. Take the ball! Take it!" [Russel kicks ball] M1: "Way to kick it in, Pele!" Russel: [Shouting] "Oh hahaha. Pele! Good one! Hehehe.. Ok! Come on! Suck it up guys! We´ll get those runs back! This is where we dig down! We just need one more out!" [Whispering] "Oh look! A rightie! Oh Lord, thank you. Thank you so much. I owe you." [Shouting] "This loser can´t hit! No batter! Come on, this is where we take them out!" [Whispering] "Uh oh, what´s happening? Where´s the rightie going? What? Who´s this guy? He´s a leftie and he´s pinch hitting. No! No!" [Shouting] "Why´s he pointing at me!?" [Ball is hit]
Russel: [Shouting] "Oh my Lord! What have I done to deserve this?!" M3: "I got it! I got it!" [Running over to the ball near Russel] [Thud! Crashes into Russel] M3: "Whoa! Sorry about that, Russel. Are you ok?" Russel: [Shouting] "HELL YEAH! We´re up now! It´s our turn to kick a little ass!" M3: "All right, Russel. I think you´re up first." Russel: "NOOOOO!!"