I wake up every morning, Six o´clock, I`m right on time I eat a low fat breakfast, I tie a perfect tie I kiss the wife, I hug the kids, I pat the dogs and cats
I never lose anything, my car keys or my hat
´Cause I`m the man of the year I`m the man of the year
I never cheat at finals, or miss a day at school My urine tests are perfect, my prostate is a jewel
´Cause I`m the man of the year I`m the man of the year ´Cause I`m the man of the year I`m never, ever jealous Never, ever cruel I`m a graduate of Harvard Where I never broke the rules
The queen made me a knight
The pope made me a saint The president plays golf with me I make Madonna faint
So why am I so lonely Depressed and in despair If I pull this trigger in my mouth will anybody care
It was the greatest funeral, I laid in perfect state And later I will meet the lord, I bet he just can`t wait
To meet the man of the year I`m the man of the year Stand in line to meet the man I`m the man, I`m the man, I`m the man