Fake Tales of San Francisco
Echo through the room
More point to a wedding disco
Without a bride or groom

There´s a super cool band yeah
With their trilbys and their glasses of white wine
And all the weekend rockstars in the toilets
Practicing their lines

I don´t want to hear you
(Kick me out, kick me out)
I don´t want to hear you no
(Kick me out, kick me out)

Fake Tales of San Francisco
Echo through the air
And there´s a few bored faces in the back
All wishing they weren´t there

And as the microphone squeaks
A young girl´s telephone beeps
Yeah she´s dashing for the exit

She´s running to the streets outside
"Oh you´ve saved me," she screams down the line
"The band weren´t very good
And I´m not having a nice time

Yeah but his bird thinks it´s amazing, though
So all that´s left
Is the proof that love´s not only blind but deaf

He talks of San Francisco, he´s from Hunter´s Bar
I don´t quite know the distance
But I´m sure that´s far
I´m sure that´s pretty far

I´d love to tell you all my problem
You´re not from New York City, you´re from Rotterdam
So get off the bandwagon, and put down the handbook

Get off the bandwagon and put down the handbook