How many years have I spent aloom Decades weaving, all my time consumed My head swim with melodies, perfumes Obsessing over what they´d etch on my tomb The sleepless nights staring at the moon
Green smoke crawling out my mouth in plumes Lead drop to the engines of my gloom Dreaming states in the vanities of youth I am the other, the lowest Impostor syndrome, always forced to prove I am a lover, a poet Grander ego will give me more to lose
I should have known After all this time in grace I was so close to serenity And I should have felt While struggling for peace I was only ever fighting, torturing me
My own worst enemy ??? All the time spent scheming
I couldn´t hear my soul scream I made a fantasy, my own scheme The only way to follow is blindly My eyes are open So much for loyalty My eyes are open I made a nightmare of my dream
I was so close to serenity I was only ever fighting me
I should have known After all this time in grace I was so close to serenity And I should have felt While struggling for peace I was only ever fighting, torturing me
Now that I´ve stopped to rest I´ve gained clarity My perception widening All the frustrations that I felt Clinging so tightly to identity Was a dissonance of thought A war between action and belief A house can´t serve two masters For years I chose so carelessly The work became an idol I offered praise up tirelessly Once I cast it from me My suffering spirit found harmony As I forsake my false sense of self I embrace the fullness of my being The fullness of my being Fullness of my being The fullness of my being
I should have known After all this time in grace I was so close to serenity And I should have felt While struggling for peace I was only ever fighting, torturing me