Let me tell a story ´bout a boy named Brian
This is not a fairy tale, no, that´s not what I´m implyin´
This is really not the type rhyme, writing ´bout flexin´

Got some bitches on the phone but I´m really not replyin´ type shit
With the clique, and we going out to get ourselves a drink
To the fast lane, might make the pedal fuckin´ sink
Bumpin´ Lil Wayne, feelin´ like we ain´t got time to think
Cigarettes, feelin´ like we be the kings, got to the party ´bout 11:28
Went up to the bartender askin´ for some Bombay
No mixer, straight up, so you know I´m gettin´ wasted
Then I realized I ain´t even bring my paper
Mike nowhere to be seen, losin´ like I´m Charlie Sheen
We can let them wait, panickin´ ´cause now my glass is clean

Talkin´ to the bartender, "Sorry sir, I´m just a teen"
That´s when I finally met the girl of my fuckin´ dreams

Ain´t no game that I play when it comes to
Gettin´ that kitty out the cage for my night, go
Drive to store just to buy a fuckin´ mattress
If that can mean she gon´ end up on my nitrous

Back to the story and now I´m talkin´ to this girl
I´ma call her Tracy and she lookin´ like dessert
She noticin´ that I´m trussin´, then she asked me, "What for?"
And I told her everything, and she gave me three fours
She said, "Where you wanna go?" and I told her, "I don´t know"

"Do you got a girlfriend? That don´t really matter, though"
I´m like, "Oh shit," thinkin´ ´bout where this gonna go
So I proceed, man´s never did this shit before, aye
Back to her place now, tryna get my thing up
2 AM, whiskey dick, 80% discount
So I had to go down, cruisin´ down to poon town
Making sure I put that bitch´s frown on upside-down
Gettin´ pretty wet, sweat runnin´ down her neck
And the kitty so cute, I wanna keep it as a pet
She so clean, man, that pussy smell like honeydew zest
Finally gettin´ hard, so you know what´s finna happen next

Ain´t no game that I play when it comes to
Gettin´ that kitty out the cage for my night, go
Drive to store just to buy a fuckin´ mattress
If that can mean she gon´ end up on my nitrous

Strugglin´ to put the Jimmy on, turnin´ red, I feel like a million
Then she gettin´ on top and your boy just start to feel hysteria
"Bump and Grind" playin´ in the stereo when I told her, "It´s my first time"
And she told me, "Baby, it´s fine, I don´t mind"
Then she held my hand and it was intertwined
My god, it was nothin´ like what I had in my mind
Now it´s time to put it in, baby, now it´s primetime
This is where the fun begun
Heard her moan and I´m feeling like I´m ´bout to fuckin´ cum

Heard a knock, now your boy´s got to go and fuckin´ run
Then I made a jump, heard the loudest scream ever
It was from her fuckin´ mom, aye
Called Mike on the team, said I need to leave the scene
He done picked me up, told him ´bout the girl that did the deed
Even said her name, then he asked if he could take a peek
Jumped out his fuckin´ seat, turns out I fucked his sis