This old middle finger has grown fat and tired from flicking the bird
My mouth has grown cankerous from spitting dirty words

I feel like a strung out snuffaluffaguss
On the south side wearing Vietnamese cowboy clothes
And I found out the hard way that the pathway to her heart is not through her nose

I´m tired of being rude, ticked off drunk and crude
My woman can´t bring me home to ma ´cause I am the dude
Got fired for swinging this beer, need to wipe off this ugly sneer
My woman can´t bring me home to pa cause I am too weird

And she wants a gentleman
Nothing more, just a gentle friend

It´s getting hard to lie through my teeth
´Cause they rotted out and they ´re not all there
I need my old man to wash my mouth out with soap and my mother to scrub this nasty hair
Why the fuck is a munchkin on the highway jumping a trash can in Congolese cowboy clothes
And like a deer transfixed by headlight the bumper crushed his head while I god damn froze

I´m tired of being rude, ticked off drunk and crude
My woman can´t bring me home to ma ´cause I am the dude
Got fired for swinging this beer, need to wipe off this ugly sneer
My woman can´t bring me home to pa cause I am too weird

I´m tired of being rude, ticked off drunk and crude
My woman can´t bring me home to ma ´cause I am the dude
Got fired for swinging this beer, need to wipe off this ugly sneer
My woman can´t bring me home to pa cause I am too queer

And she wants a gentleman
Nothing more, just gentleman
Nothing less, just a gentleman
Nothing more just a gentleman
Nothing less, just gentleman
Nothing more, just a gentleman
Nothing less than a gentleman
Than a gentleman
Than a gentleman

A gentleman, a gentleman, a gentleman

C´mon, c´mon, c´mon, c´mon